spookymormon: spookymormon: my mom always texts me rude things so ive just started replying with an emoji of an eggplant and it gets her so pissed it’s great
assiest: life is full of little surprises, for example: ‘dog food lid’ when read backwards is ‘dildo of god’ truly amazing
oneewithnature asked: hello beautiful woman
craplos: ladies. be careful when u wear spaghetti straps. it might distract the boys. they’ll start thinking of spaghetti. they will get hungry. they will stop at nothing to get their spaghetti.
UPPED MY SQUAT WEIGHT!
So pumped. Now to take a shower without sitting down.
You’re sunlight Smoke rings and cigarettes Outlines and kisses from silverscreens Oh Dear never saw you comin’ Oh My Look what you have done You’re my favorite song Always on the tip of my tongue